Shattered

by SpikesKat

It was just sheer dumb luck on his part that he caught the movement out of the corner of his eye, given the ear-piercing roar as dimensions opened and all Hell broke loose around him and his friends… literally. He could only stare, jaw agape, as Buffy leapt off the tower, like she’d suddenly sprouted wings and could fly. In that moment, he actually believed she could.

Then the laws of gravity put paid to his fanciful notions, and he just watched as she plummeted down to the ground, much the same way Spike had earlier in their fight, her body captured only momentarily by the widening chasm of electricity that continued to open dimension after dimension.

Her sacrifice – and Xander could easily see that that had been what she was trying to do – had been in vain. Buffy’s blood wasn’t enough. Opened by Dawn, apparently the gateway could only be closed by her as well.

He forced himself to look away from his friend’s broken body and returned his attention to the tower above. Dawn was alternately staring down at her sister and up at the night sky, now lit up like a Christmas tree. Even from such a great distance he could see the crushed expression on her face. Easily heard her heart-rending cry when she finally spotted her sister’s broken body lying several stories below.

The hum of portals opening all around him steadily got louder, growls and battle cries adding to the noise as creatures of indeterminable designation came through and started wreaking destruction on Sunnydale and each other, all vying for a position of power in this new world. Xander ignored it all, though, and concentrated on Dawn, knowing that he’d never reach her if she decided to do something crazy, like, say, jump after her sister.

Still didn’t mean that he wouldn’t try.

Or, he would have if she hadn’t chosen that moment to copy Buffy’s actions, seeking to end what Glory – and her blood – had begun.

She didn’t fall far, though, because suddenly Spike was there, latching onto her outstretched hand at the last second, leaving her dangling precariously over the edge.

The air whooshed out of Xander’s lungs; his legs became too weak to support his weight and he sank to his knees right there in the middle of all of the chaos and confusion.

Spike had caught her. Xander knew not where he’d come from. The last he’d seen of the vampire, he’d been buried beneath construction debris, either that, or his dust had mixed with it. But, he’d obviously survived, and what’s more, had apparently pushed aside his own pain to re-climb the steps leading to Dawn. It was a lot more than he, or anyone else, would have expected.

“Xander?”

It took him a minute to realize that Willow was talking to him in his head, so transfixed was he on Dawn and Spike, and his attempt to save her. No easy feat, he was sure, given his battered body. But, there was determination on his face, and Xander had no doubt that he would succeed.

“Willow?” he said aloud, confused, and finally chanced looking around for where she might be in all the melee. “What—?”

“Glory’s minions have stopped fighting. They’re running away from the demons coming out of the portals. Where are you?”

“I’m—” His voice broke off, his attention returning once more to Spike and Dawn. Dawn was shaking her head frantically at him for some reason, screaming as she started twisting her body this way and that, like she was trying to force him to let go. Spike was ignoring her and was desperately trying to pull her to safety. “I… oh, god. No! DAWN!”

His cry rivaled Spike’s in its intensity as Dawn plummeted to the ground, only to freeze several feet above it as she was enveloped by the growing energy.

In a blinding flash, the portals disappeared along with the demons, and when Xander blinked, Dawn was gone too. He vaguely heard a keening wail over the loud ringing in his ears at the deafening silence, but he was too wrapped up in his own despondency to pay it any notice. For all he knew, it could have been him. Probably had been him.

Sunnydale – the world – was safe, but at what cost?

Buffy was dead.

Dawn was… too. His mind shied away from it, even as the rational part told him that the only way the dimensions could be closed was with her blood. Giles had said as much. He and Buffy had argued over it. He remembered.

“Xander…” It was Anya this time, kneeling beside him, tentatively hugging him.

“Dawn… she’s…” He choked out. Tears made his vision blurry. “And Buffy.”

He couldn’t say anything else for the lump in his throat and tried to find her body among the debris now littering the ground.

“I know. She was…” Anya’s voice trailed off, unsure what to say in the face of Xander’s devastation. “Willow’s coming,” she said finally, and sounded almost grateful for that fact.

“Xander.”

“Willow.”

And there were no more words between the lifelong friends. They held each other as they cried, until finally Giles joined them, his face distraught, the affection he had for Buffy plain for anyone to see.

“We should… uh….” Giles gestured with his head, but they all understood.

The base of Glory’s hastily wrought tower was no place to linger.

“I’ll see to…” Buffy, Giles didn’t say.

Xander got to his feet, awkwardly wiping away his tears with the back of his hand. He watched Giles square his shoulders and walk away then come back moments later with Buffy’s body cradled in his arms.

They had taken maybe a handful of steps when Xander stopped and said, “Spike!” He turned back towards the tower and squinted up at the landing.

The dark made it impossible to see anything.

“Let me just…” Xander walked away from the others and climbed the steps leading to the top of the tower. The structure creaked and groaned as he moved from one level to the next, as if ready to crumble to the ground, the purpose of its construction futile at that point. It made him hurry up the last few stories.

“Spike,” he called out once he’d reached the top.

There was no answer from the vampire, not even when Xander reached his side, knelt down, and gently shook his shoulder, calling his name repeatedly.

Spike’s eyes were open and fixed on nothing. His body was a literal corpse as he lay there unmoving, curled on one side in a fetal position.

Xander tried though, because, Spike was… one of them now. His trying to save Dawn proved as much. He couldn’t, or wouldn’t, leave one of his friends behind.

His attempts yielded nothing – not the first flicker of recognition in his eyes that Xander was there, urging him to his feet. Finally, he just yanked Spike to a sitting position, managed to get his shoulder propped under the vampire’s arm and awkwardly tugged him to his feet. He literally dragged Spike down each flight of stairs, stopping several times along the way to catch his breath. Lugging one hundred fifty plus pounds of dead weight was tiring.

As he reached the bottom, Anya was waiting for him, and together they managed to carry Spike back to Giles’ and got him settled on the couch.

A few days later, Spike was in the same position. Not even mentioning Buffy’s funeral the day before had elicited a response. His pale features were almost ashen now. Xander was scared that at any moment Spike would turn to dust right before his eyes.

Everyone else seemed not to care, too buried in their own misery to bother with anyone else’s. Xander had latched onto the problem of Spike so he wouldn’t have to dwell on his own. He just hated that nothing seemed to be working.

When a week went by with no change, he broke down and called Angel.

~*~*~*~*~

Xander was surprised at the speed with which Angel arrived in Sunnydale. It seemed like he’d only just hung up when there was a knock on Giles’ door and he was opening it to reveal Angel. He blinked at seeing the worry on his face; Xander had only ever seen what he liked to think of as Angel’s “constipated” face, so the obvious emotion was definitely a surprise.

“Come in,” Xander finally said, and prayed that his invite would work, being that it wasn’t his house. Either it had, or the vampire’s invitation had never been revoked, but Angel stepped inside, and was kneeling down in front of Spike in a blur of movement too quick for Xander to see. He thought he heard Angel say something like, “Oh Will…”, but the tenderness of voice was at such great odds with the Angel he knew that he discounted the notion.

“What happened?” Angel demanded, though his voice was barely above a whisper.

His eyes were still glued to Spike’s face so he missed the way Xander’s shoulder’s slumped, like the weight of the world had suddenly settled on them. No one had bothered to call Angel and tell him about Buffy. Giles was buried in a bottle and Willow had her hands full with caring for Tara. Xander wasn’t going to – Angel had left and had his own life in Los Angeles – and even now, he thought about not saying anything, but he believed that Spike’s condition was because of Buffy, and Dawn, so there wasn’t any way he could not tell Angel of Buffy’s death.

“Buffy died,” he said abruptly. “Spike tried saving her sister but couldn’t.”

Xander didn’t flinch at Angel’s glacial expression. If anything, his body language matched the vampire’s, daring him to say something. For a second there, Xander thought Angel would, and he almost welcomed the fight.

The room grew heavy with tension at the prolonged silence.

Angel was the first to look away, his attention returning once more to the comatose vampire in front of him. “When?” he finally asked.

“A week ago,” Xander replied.

“And Spike?”

“The same.”

He watched Angel just nod, saying nothing. A few minutes later, he stood and gathered Spike’s body in his arms.

“What are you doing?” Xander demanded.

“I’m taking Spike with me.”

“Why?” Spike was one of them now; Angel couldn’t have him. Xander opened his mouth to say as much.

“Spike is gone, Xander. The kindest thing to do would be to stake him.”

“Stake him?”

“I’ll take him with me and do it,” Angel’s voice was heavy with resignation.

“But—”

“It’s for the best, Xander. Trust me.”

Xander wanted to lash out at Angel. Trust him? Like hell he would.

But there was something in the vampire’s expression that held him back. There was misery in the brown eyes staring at him so stoically. And he didn’t think it was because of Buffy either. Finally Xander nodded and walked over to the door, opening it for Angel.

“Goodbye, Xander,” Angel said, and Xander knew he wouldn’t see the vampire again. That this was the last trip he’d ever make to Sunnydale.

Xander didn’t blame him.

The End

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